Just an update...

So today is January 20th and I am very exhausted. I don't know why but I am, so I am sleeping if I need to sleep.

I did start writing a blog so I'm trying to figure out if I'm trying to avoid what I was gonna talk about on the blog or not. Most likely I was avoid, I am avoiding it.

Really it is hard for me to talk my feelings out on this and and it's really hard for me to express myself. I just don't want to say anything. Well actually I do want to say something but I'm afraid of being judged or criticized or told my feelings don't matter.

And it's not exactly like that's ever happened but probably something like that did or I was told as a child to not tell anybody anything, you know, keep a secret. I don't know, just very exhausting.